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Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Self Portrait Tuesday: "Introduce Yourself" #5

DSC06406
This is my High School Senior picture. I remember taking this photo, walking into the little trailer and sitting in the chair feeling awkward. I remember feeling pressure that this picture look good because I knew it was going to be in the yearbook. I was scared I would look my usual shlumpy self, and be forever remembered that way. When I first saw this photo, I was instantly in love with it. The person in it looks happy, and fun, and smart. She looks like she's a social genius and maybe would turn the head of a boy or two. In reality in highschool I was or at least felt like the opposite of all those things. I was insecure, fighting depression and scars from the past. I had a few friends but ate lunch alone for the first 2 years of highschool. I look back and wish I could go back more as the person I am today, I wonder how different it would be. Would I try out for soccer like I wanted to do but never did? would I go out with my friends and make even more? I'm sure It would be a entirely different experience. I'm happy overall with the way I've changed, what I'm even more excited about is seeing how much more I will change in the next 12 years.

10 Comments:

Blogger acumamakiki said...

That last word I'd ever use to describe this picture or the person pictured, as schlumpy. I know you've said you don't brush your hair or wear a lot of makeup but I think you're just lovely my friend.

9:33 AM  
Blogger la vie en rose said...

you are so gorgeous!!! your high school experience sounds a lot like mine. i hated high school and would never go back. i had a few friends (okay one) but like you i ate most of the time by myself. i know people who want to go back and miss high school but that was never me. good ridance high school years!

11:27 AM  
Blogger ESB said...

I, too, was part of the Eat Lunch Alone club! I even rearranged my schedule so that there were no time blocks left for lunch, to avoid the situation altogether. What an utter nightmare...Anyway, this is a lovely photo of you...

11:43 AM  
Blogger dani said...

i'm surprised by how little you've changed physically from all those years ago. amazing!

3:09 PM  
Blogger kerry said...

this post gave me hope and encouragement, as i am only a few years out of what was a negative high school experience that sounds some like your own.. i am just now trying to learn how to leave it in the past and change for the better. thanks for writing this, and for your courage to move on in your own life and then share it with others!

5:15 AM  
Blogger Glamorous Jo said...

When I first looked at this photo I thought it was Izzy from Grey's Anatomy!! Beautiful!

7:54 AM  
Blogger gkgirl said...

what a beautiful photo!
i love it...
you look nothing like
the word "schlumpy" might mean...

but i know exactly what you mean
about not fitting in
and being lonely through school
and
especially about wondering what
it would be like if you were then
what you are now...
which in my case,
would be confident....

i was definately lacking
confidence
back then
:)

10:06 AM  
Blogger madness rivera said...

Great picture even if those were tough times. Maybe the camera captured your true self in a split second -- before you even knew what that was.

8:19 PM  
Blogger Sonia said...

You look so beautiful, so happy, so confident, Heather!!!
Love your moving words and feelings about the High School time.

12:36 PM  
Anonymous Cathy T. said...

Beautiful photo. I love to read your blog as your days sound so similar in some ways to mine....but different too. Love all the photos you add to your blog!

3:46 AM  

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