Mamma's got new shoes

A couple of weeks ago I got some new shoes. Yipee!!! I love new things and the newness joy when I wear them still hasn't worn off. They are already looking a little dirty, but that's ok, I like the lived in look. My lovely sister gave the mary jane's to me. I love getting new things. The funny thing is I always feel guilty spending the money so I rarely buy myself anything. Usually John is pushing me to buy something I want. I've always been that way. Even when I had my first job. I put all my money into a savings account never spending anything until I had thousands of dollars saved up. I like that about myself, that I can save and don't have to always have new things, but I don't like the guilt feeling when I do spend. I'm not sure where it came from, but I sure would like to get rid of it.